Do You Feel Unworthy?
"Often, people feel unworthy, or feel as though they have to suffer to get the things they want, or the way they want to be in life, but it is a false perception. We are all deserving of receiving all of the blessings and the good that the Universe has to offer, and we can have and be all that we desire, when we believe it is possible and we place our thoughts, intentions, and energy on that which we want to bring into our life. Live in gratitude and the shift will happen." Excerpted from "Healing at the Vortex".
I began writing my book many years ago and it was during that time that I began to realize that there were many times in my own life that I felt undeserving. Undeserving of good, of happiness, of financial security, of intelligence, and the list goes on and on. I now know that the way I felt stemmed from something that took place during childhood. When I was about 4 or 5 years old, I was playing and I "did" something and got hurt, nothing major, my mom put some Bactine and a Band-Aid and off I went.
I don't know what it was I did, I just know that in that moment my dad snapped and yelled at me, in front of others, and said, "are you stupid or something?" Well, that was the first time I remember the twinge in my stomach, that feeling of not being good enough. As the years went on, that was one of the "go to" statements my dad would shout at me. In fact, I believe I was about 40 the last time he said it to me.
When the people we love talk to us as if we are "stupid" or treat us as though our feelings or opinions don't matter, that we don't matter; we begin to believe that we don't matter, especially children. Children's brains are not fully formed and their logic and reasoning are unable to process things like, projection or others' shortcomings. All a child feels and begins to carry as part of their identity, is that they are not good enough, or enough, or smart, etc. They rarely see this behavior and think, "oh it's not me, it's them" because they literally don't have that ability yet.
If there is no intervention this will follow many into adolescence and then into adulthood, and the cycle will continue. Not only will the cycle continue for them, it also continues as they pass it down to others, like the domino affect. However, if there is intervention, a caring adult, someone to listen, or someone to say, "it's them, not you", etc. this idea that they are not enough will be stamped out and often, those that have the intervention will grow up to work in fields of social work, CASA, etc. to be a voice for victimized children.
What is important to note here is that often people who feel unworthy don't get that way on their own. They are "taught" this thought process and in order to overcome these ingrained ideas/beliefs we must unlearn.
Sometimes people want to make it really complicated and in all honesty, it's about simplicity.
and it is as simple as learning how to shift your thoughts to the more positive. Surrounding yourself with people who know and appreciate your worth. And most of all, do not believe someone who says you are stupid or undeserving. You are here, on this earth, not only are you not stupid, you deserve every opportunity and every ounce of respect that everyone else deserves and NEVER LET ANYONE TELL YOU OTHERWISE.
Sending love and light,